I'm trying to figure out why I won't blog. I know I want to record things and I kind of feel sick to my stomach that I don't. I guess I can blame it on my phone. Since I've been able to check email and do the majority of my computer-related things right on my phone, I avoid my computer. I'm going to have to try to fix whatever it is that's truly making me dread sitting down in front of my computer. When I sit down for more than a few minutes I start feeling major anxiety. I really have to figure it out..because this is important. I'm not recording super awesome stuff and it will haunt me one day if I don't.
The first day we arrived he was very nervous. I got the start time wrong (it actually starts at 9:15 rather than 9) and so we had some waiting around to do. His nervousness broke my heart. But he was brave. And he's done very well. He had one morning where he cried going in. But his preschool teacher sent me a text with a photo of him happily playing before I could even get out of the parking lot.
The preschool is held in a United Methodist church. Miles attends "chapel" one of the mornings and is drawing lots of crosses on his pictures. The teachers are as loving and kind as you could ever imagine. It is a happy, good place for him to be while adjusting to not being with ME 24/7.
Last week I nearly burst into tears. Miles had just gotten home. We were standing in my bathroom and he said, "Oh, Mom, I got these for you at recess." He reached down into his pocket and carefully pulled out two miniscule, purple flowers. Concerned he said, "I had 3. I don't know where the other one is. I picked 3 for you." I don't know why those soft, fleshy little fingers, digging in his pockets to hand me tiny flowers (maybe they're weeds?) with a little lint made me feel so tender for my boy. This is my hand holding the flowers a few days later. I couldn't bring myself to throw them away.
Today Miles was playing with a new stud-finder which Jason had purchased yesterday at Home Depot. He was trying to find the studs in all of his toys and things. "Miles," I said, "Please don't play with that. Dad will not be happy if you break it. He just bought that because the other one got broken." "I am not breaking it," he said. "And Dad said that I could play with it any time I want." "No," I said, "I don't think he said that." "Yes, he did!" Miles exclaimed, eyebrows raised and jugular vein sticking out as it is wont to do, "Maybe you just didn't hear him. Because...he said it in his MIND."
Miles "selfie"
My sleeping boy after a long afternoon and a very long screaming fit. He likes us to snuggle like this. His arms barely fit around my neck. It reminds me how little he still is. I'm going to miss these nap times!!!
2 comments:
Those flowers are the sweetest thing ever. And, I burst out with a snort of laughter about Jason telling Miles that with his mind. Yah. No wonder you didn't hear it.
And, here is an interesting thing. It's not really why I blog of course, I just really like to (though I also hate to sit at our desk computer and can only do it on the laptop). BUT, I wrote a little post on Mormon mommy blogs (I'll need to repost it on my blog) about what we'd been talking about about getting to know our ancestors maybe allowing them to be closer to us.
One lady commented and said how strange because she had just been thinking and blogging those same thoughts. I read her post. I think she is a big genealogist, but she said how she'd been feeling more and more strongly that getting to know them somehow granted them access to us. Then she said something cool and interesting. She said something like -- so wouldn't it follow that if we record our histories, make it easier for our posterity to know us, etc. we might be granted more permission and access to help them.
What? Anyway, I'd of course like the millennium any day now, but I thought that was a super cool idea and it really touched me. Maybe that is part of the reason we are encouraged so much to keep journals, etc.
Sweet Miles saving those flowers for you melted my heart. May have made me tear up, probably because I only hope that one day Roman will do sweet little things like that as well :) Oh and I had to read to Bryant the part about Jason saying the he could play with it, "in his Mind." lol!!
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